How shameless!

I don't know whether to write this article or not. I'm embarrassed about making a mistake; I'm embarrassed about being wrong and exposing myself publicly; I'm embarrassed about not expressing myself well or not making myself understood. I'm embarrassed to talk about embarrassment and to say that there's no trace of it left.

Will I seem old-fashioned for talking about a sentiment that, for many, has served only to repress and control public morality? Or will I have to swallow my pride and talk about a subject that no one discusses anymore out of shame—if only so that a historian reading this a century from now will know that there was a small group that still believed in its social function?

Anthropologists say that shame has a clear evolutionary origin and that, thanks to it, the species has endured for hundreds of thousands of years. The reason is simple: human beings are social creatures, and outside the group, survival is very difficult—the chances of survival drop dramatically. Thus, antisocial behavior—such as an affront to the group, deception, or disrespect—would result in the individual’s ostracism and, most likely, death, as they could no longer rely on the group’s resources and protection. The best-adapted individuals would be those who, naturally and almost instinctively, knew not to expose themselves to the group’s negative judgment, thereby maintaining the group’s unity and increasing its survival rate. We see that this is part of human nature in young children. As soon as they are old enough to realize that they are not the only beings in the universe—but rather that they live in a community—they take refuge in their parents’ arms and lower their heads when they feel they are the center of attention in front of a group of adults they do not know. Rather than expose themselves to the group’s negative judgment, it is better to flee or hide.

Embarrassment is unpleasant for normal people. So much so that—I’m sure this has happened to you—after an accidental fall in public, we’re more worried about being seen than about the severity of any injury we might have sustained. We all go out of our way to downplay the fall as we try to compose ourselves as gracefully as possible, with a smile on our faces, and make a quick getaway while elegantly concealing our momentary limp. 

But that sense of shame felt by “normal” people—if you think about it—has gradually faded away in the West. I don’t know if it started with those home-video shows where people shamelessly submitted footage of their slips and falls, but the fact is that social media is now full of the most absurd challenges in which people put themselves at risk with all kinds of falls or humiliations for the sole purpose of making others laugh. There are also those who profit by shamelessly displaying all kinds of embarrassments (physical or emotional) on social media. We can accurately say that shamelessness has now become a profession. The success of individualism is demonstrated by the fact that no act, no matter how embarrassing, puts you at risk because there will always be a group that supports you unconditionally and will even pay you for it.

A fragmented society like ours loses its ability to react and to protest collectively, and we just put up with everything. 

Rulers take advantage of this by now shamelessly flaunting their shenanigans and corruption, knowing full well that no one will oust them because they have their «group» to cover up their shameful deeds. The prime example of this «new politics» is the President of the United States, who—among many other things—has brazenly recounted how he managed to cheat during the World Cup. There’s no longer any need to hide when doing something disgraceful; they tell us all about it at press conferences. And what about the situation of the Spanish government, besieged by corruption scandals at the highest levels? Do you see worried faces? How would you look if you were caught in that very same situation? Wouldn’t you wish the ground would swallow you up? Even among Christians, there are those who flaunt their utterly un-gospel-like ideological arrogance, without the slightest concern about being cast out of the family or the scandal that Jesus so seriously warned us about. And they do so publicly and defiantly. They’ve got some nerve!

I, however, stand with those who still have a sense of shame. Those who, with humility, acknowledge that they can make mistakes, recognize the authority of the group to which they belong, and ask for forgiveness when they—or those who depend on them—mess up. Even when the wrongs were committed many years or centuries ago. The most recent popes have done just that in the face of cases of abuse of all kinds. With their courageous attitude, they highlight what is important: that the common good takes precedence over the good of the individual (without negating it) and that we are not only children, but brothers and sisters—children of the same Father who sees each of our actions. They give me the courage to say this loud and clear: What a lack of shame!