Affective-sexual education is undoubtedly one of the greatest challenges in the formation of children and young people. It is a difficult area because the failure rates in the healthy and full experience of sexuality are high, but at the same time it is fundamental, since the consequences of a good or bad education in this aspect can determine the happiness or suffering of a person throughout his or her life. Therefore, we can no longer ignore it or leave it to social networks or entertainment to educate in this area. It is unavoidable to address it in schools and parishes, places where young people should receive clear, deep and adjusted answers to their development, from an integral perspective that encompasses the body, mind, heart and spiritual dimension.
To achieve this, it is essential that more and more training agents are trained in this field. Initiatives such as the programs for monitors Teen Star o Let's Learn to Love offer effective tools to accompany children, adolescents and adults in their affective and sexual growth.
A few years ago, I took the course of monitors of the Teen StarThis training not only empowered me, but also changed my understanding of affective-sexual education. Since then, I have incorporated this new perspective not only in my personal life, but also in my language classes and in every meaningful conversation I have with young people and adults.
Today, I teach about a hundred sessions a year and they have all come about thanks to the word-of-mouthHow did it all start? Simply by talking to my students. They were the first to become interested, to spread the word and invite me to other forums where they were active. When someone finds answers to their deepest concerns, they share them, and this is how this training, which I consider fundamental, has been expanding.
Speak clearly and gently
Along the way, I have discovered that the key to approaching affective-sexual education lies in finding a balance between clarity and delicacy, between argumentation and personal testimony. It is not just a matter of giving information, but of helping to understand and live one's affectivity in a full and authentic way.
Giving metaphorical answers about sexuality does not help young people because, far from clarifying their doubts, it generates confusion and leaves room for erroneous interpretations. Stork stories may sound nice, but they do not clearly explain the reality of the body, the meaning of surrender or the deep reasons behind a full experience of affectivity and sexuality.
Young people need direct, well-argued answers, adapted to their level of understanding, to help them make conscious and free decisions. When they do not find these answers at home or at school, they look for them elsewhere, where they often receive distorted or ideologized information. Therefore, it is essential to talk to them truthfully and straightforwardly, in a language they understand and that allows them to see the beauty and responsibility of human sexuality.
I have taught sessions of an hour and a half and up to five hours. I have spoken to high school teenagers, college students, professionals from different fields, singles and married couples, priests and married couples, parents of young children and older adults. Each group has its concerns, its questions, its doubts. And in all of them I have seen how, with the right formation, paths of light open up in the midst of confusion.
Speak early
One of the most valuable experiences I have had is to see how this training transforms those who receive it. I have been told many times: "Now I understand", "For the first time this makes sense.", "Now it is clear to me that I want to be a virgin when I get married.". These words do not come from people outside the faith, but from young people with a solid Christian formation, who simply had never had a clear, open and deep conversation about these issues.
And not only young people. I have seen parents of six, seven, eight-year-olds overcome their fears and dare to talk to their children about affectivity and sexuality. They have taken the step and, after doing so, they are delighted with the consequences. Because affective-sexual education is not a single talk or a specific moment; it is a path that is walked from childhood, naturally, truthfully and with love.
In my sessions with parents I always say that "better to speak a year early than five minutes late.". It is preferable to address issues of affectivity and sexuality in advance, rather than waiting for problems or irreversible situations to arise. Early education allows young people to make informed and responsible decisions, strengthening their self-esteem and capacity for discernment.
Talking to them before they face pressures or doubts prevents them from resorting to inappropriate sources or making hasty decisions without understanding the consequences. On the other hand, if you wait too long to address these issues, it may be too late to prevent painful mistakes or to correct ingrained misconceptions. Therefore, it is better to anticipate and accompany the maturation process with clear, accessible and appropriate information for each stage of life.
Catholic schools, parishes and institutions
To talk about affectivity and sexuality is to talk about life itself. However, for too long, these topics have been considered taboo in educational and religious environments, leaving young people at the mercy of contradictory, superficial and often harmful messages they receive from their environment, society and the media. In fact, in the last two decades we have allowed young people to be educated by pornography.
For this reason, it is essential that affective-sexual formation be given priority in two key institutions in the lives of children and young people: schools and the parishes or ecclesial realities in which they live. Both are places of reference in which not only the mind, but also the heart and conscience are educated, helping to form persons of integrity, capable of living their affectivity and sexuality with maturity and responsibility.
Young people have questions, concerns and doubts about their bodies, emotions and relationships. If they do not find answers in a safe and educational environment, they will look for them on the internet, on social networks or in conversations with their peers, where information is often incomplete, biased or outright wrong. The school has the responsibility to offer an adequate framework to learn about affectivity and sexuality with depth, rigor and coherence.
But it is not only about biological information. It is necessary that this training be given from an integral perspective, helping students to understand the beauty of human love, the value of commitment and the importance of self-discipline and respect. It is not enough to talk about anatomy and risk prevention; we must talk about dignity, meaning, responsibility and vocation.
In addition, if Catholic schools have as their mission to educate in the light of the Gospelto ignore affective-sexual education is a serious omission. The Church has a very rich vision of sexuality, the family and human love, which should be transmitted with the same naturalness with which other subjects are taught.
expert in affective-sexual education
