Stop. Rest. How important it is to know how to rest! Slowing down the pace that those of us who live in large urban centers - and those who don't, on many occasions, too - is a great challenge to dedicate quality time to the family. I am referring to those who live at home with us, we don't have to go much further.
Now that the vacations are upon us, that challenge should cease to be a challenge. We must take the opportunity to strengthen the bonds in the family. Get to know each other. To create irreplaceable and enriching moments. From parents to children, from children to parents. And if there are grandparentsto enter into the equation (trying not to do it during all the vacations... as a recommendation).
Restoring the balance
Retake that vital balance that we often forget during the school year. Slowing down our life during the vacations and encouraging family and friendship meetings will prepare our children to face a new school year with confidence and renewed energy.
The family is the first place where we learn, where we grow, where we are formed. It is very important to dedicate time to activities with our children during this vacation time. Playing, reading, playing sports, long lunches or dinners, breakfasts! Let our children see that we are able to have breakfast without rushing! They won't believe it... We can have a coffee sitting down, without mentioning the dreaded phrase "we're late"! They will freak out.
Not everything has to be about sharing a physical space or common activity. It is also about being emotionally present, listening to the questions and comments they ask us, listening to their illusions, asking them about them. With young children and adolescents, eh?
It is a good time to grow in generosity. Take a break from screens. Above all, from our smartphones. We, the older ones, the first ones. Let us be an example for the little ones. Let them discover that their looks are more important to us than the screen of our cell phone. Let them forget that we ever had a cell phone...
Enjoy a good movie with the family and then have a simple conversation that continues to form their critical spirit. Let them enjoy -let us enjoy- a good FIFA game with them, and let them see that we can still beat them (in order, of course, as I can see that they will throw me to the lions...).
Getting to know each other
Going out to the countryside. A good hike. Nature. Excursions in the countryside make us observe what surrounds us. Observe and admire the beauty of things, animals, insects, trees, landscapes, summer storms... Have conversations while we walk, stop for a chocolate and get our strength back, drink water, take a dip in the river... What is lazy? Almost everything that does us good and involves effort makes us lazy. If you are offered to go hiking, don't think about it and say yes.
And I leave the most important thing for last: continuing to get to know our spouse. That really makes vacation quality time. Walking together. Alone. The two of us. Hand in hand. If you can do it every day, all the better. That's the best family investment you can make. And listen. And ask. And keep listening. To get to know him or her even better. And so our admiration grows for that person with whom we have decided and committed to share life until the end.
This is the key. The two of us being a team. And that our children see it. Let them see that the other is our priority, that we really love each other, with words, phrases, looks, smiles, kisses. Really, it's essential, but don't be so sweet. Naturalness, please. But let it be seen and be seen.
Thus, next year, as a team, together, we will overcome all the adversities and difficulties that may cross our path.
10 tips
I leave you a top 10 tips for the vacations:
1) Set aside a specific time each day for your spouse.
2) Sleep well.
3) Simplify meal preparation and take the time to savor the good things.
4) Divide household chores among the family, trusting each other (without over-controlling).
5) Agree on a minimum of daily order and organization.
6) Handle and use things gently and moderate tones of voice; peace is contagious, you'll see.
7) Please turn off the cell phone.
8) Give up doing everything, seeing everything, achieving everything (perfectionist complex). If you wanted to make a plan and it didn't work out, have peace.
9) If possible, spend a large part of the vacations away from your parents' or in-laws' home to be alone with your spouse and children.
10) In the last week of vacation, set goals, together with your spouse, for the coming year. As many as you want. Of any kind.
Director of Foro de la Familia (Spain)
